Worry

November 9, 2024 • 5 min

Managing Worry: How to Unhook From Anxiety and Stay Present

Worry is a natural part of life, but it can often feel overwhelming, especially when it starts to cloud your ability to enjoy the present moment. The constant churn of “what ifs” can be exhausting and prevent you from hearing your own instincts and wise mind among the noise. While it’s normal to worry about the future, the key is to recognize that we have a choice in how long we let worry take up space in our minds.

In Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), we say, “Uncertainty is unavoidable, but worry is not.” While we can’t control everything, we do have control over how much time we spend ruminating on things that may never happen.

Recognising Worry for What It Is

Worry often arises from fear or anxiety, and it tends to escalate because it’s rooted in adrenaline and cortisol. These stress hormones focus our attention on potential dangers—real or perceived. For our ancestors, this heightened alertness was vital for survival, helping them stay alert to predators. But in the modern world, we’re not constantly facing immediate physical threats. Instead, our worries might revolve around things like job security, relationships, or health—issues that, while important, don’t require constant fear-driven attention.

One of the first steps in managing worry is recognizing it for what it is: a thought, not necessarily a fact. It’s easy to get lost in the spiral of “What if this happens?” or “What if that goes wrong?” But often, the concerns we fixate on are future-based and not something we can address right now.

Try to ask yourself: Is this happening in this moment? If the answer is no, it’s important to remind yourself that your current focus should be on what’s happening right now. Mindfulness can be incredibly helpful in this process, as it trains us to be present and aware of our thoughts.

The Power of Delaying Worry

A helpful technique for managing worry is to give it a set time to be addressed, rather than letting it dominate your thoughts throughout the day. If you feel a worry bubble up, try saying to yourself, “I’ll come back to you later.”

Set aside a specific time—maybe 15 or 30 minutes—during which you will allow yourself to fully focus on your worries. During this time, assess each concern: Can I do something about this right now? If the answer is yes, make a plan. If the answer is no, gently remind yourself that worrying about it won’t solve anything.

By setting aside dedicated worry time, you begin to unhook from the cycle of anxiety. When you come back to the worry later, you might find that its intensity has faded, or you might be able to approach it from a clearer, more rational mindset.

Mindfulness and Grounding

Sometimes, our thoughts are so absorbed in worry that we forget there’s a whole world happening around us. In these moments, grounding techniques can help bring us back to the present.

One simple method is to focus on your senses. Take a moment to notice what you can see, hear, touch, or smell. Engage fully with your surroundings and direct your attention to the here and now. This practice can provide relief from the grip of worry and bring you back to a state of calm.

You can also try breathing exercises or progressive muscle relaxation. These techniques help reduce the physical symptoms of anxiety—such as tension, headaches, or stomach discomfort—and reset your nervous system.

Creating Worry-Free Zones

In a world full of distractions and endless to-do lists, it’s easy to let worry infiltrate every moment. One way to combat this is by creating “worry-free zones” in your day. These are moments or spaces where you consciously choose not to engage with your worries.

It could be a ritual like taking a walk, reading a book, or even simply sitting with a cup of tea. Whatever it is, let it be a designated time for relaxation and peace, where you don’t allow worries to intrude.

When you return to your worries later, they might seem more manageable, and you may find that they don’t carry the same weight they did before.

The Importance of Rest and Relaxation

Rest is often overlooked when we’re focused on our anxieties. But taking time to relax—whether through a bath, a nap, or spending time with loved ones—allows your body and mind to reset. It’s much easier to tackle worries from a place of calm than from a state of stress and anxiety.

Everyone has different activities that help them relax, so take note of what works best for you. It could be anything from listening to music to spending time in nature. These activities are not just ways to pass the time—they’re vital for your well-being and can help you approach challenges with clarity and confidence.

Accepting That Some Things Are Out of Our Control

One of the most difficult aspects of worry is accepting that not everything is within our control. Sometimes, despite our best efforts, there’s nothing we can do about a particular situation right now. Learning to let go of things that are out of our hands is a powerful skill.

In these moments, it’s essential to practice self-compassion. Worry can feel like a protective instinct, but it often keeps us stuck in a cycle of fear. The more we practice letting go, the easier it becomes to refocus on the present.

Final Thoughts

While worrying is natural, it doesn’t have to control your life. By recognising worry as a thought, not a fact, and practicing techniques like mindfulness, problem-solving, and relaxation, you can unhook from the cycle of anxiety and return to the present moment. With time and practice, you’ll strengthen your ability to manage worry and make clearer decisions.

Remember, rest and relaxation are not indulgences—they’re essential for your mental and physical well-being. Whether you take time for a walk, meditate, or enjoy a favourite hobby, these moments of respite are the antidote to anxiety.

Trust that the wisdom you seek is already inside you. By learning to relax and step out of the worry cycle, you’ll be able to hear it more clearly.